Thursday, January 31, 2008

A person who truly loves you is someone who sees the pain your eyes while everyone is fooled by your fake smile.

I have decided already. I'm not gonna come with them. Well, I have lots of important things to do than to join the Bataan Trip. And I'm sure that there are still next times. We can again set another trip to that place. But for now, I'm more focus with my thesis. It has been the reason why these past few days I'm getting more and more confused.

I really wanna join tomorrow's trip but I learned that they will leave Manila at 9.30am. I have an appointment at PLM tomorrow morning. Well, I thought they will leave in the afternoon that's why I'm so excited to come with them but I was wrong. But I guess, it's better if I will just stay here in the house. After all, I had a bad dream two nights ago about losing my tooth. Many people told me that it means death.

After how many revisions made, finally, our Chapter 1 is now approved. Next problem is the 2nd Chapter. I haven't edited it because I'm too lazy and besides, I can't understand the format of that chapter. I really don't have any idea about the real format. What our adviser just told us makes it more complicated. And since, we're gonna pass it to PLM tomorrow, I'm not gonna edit it first. I'll just reason out, in case.

We are supposed to pass 3 chapters tomorrow to one of the staff of PLM but the contents of the 3rd Chapter hasn't given to us. I actually talked to my RM professor this afternoon but she told me that she will give it on Tuesday and that I should just tell that person that we only had prepared Chapters 1 and 2. And besides, I'm not in the mood to do something school-related now. But hopefully, everything will be okay tomorrow.

Second Semester hasn't ended and Defense has not yet scheduled but my friends started planning about our summer getaway. Probably, it will be on April. What most of them want is to have an out of town trip to Baguio. Okay, right now, I'm gonna say that I am not really sure if I could join them or not. Of course, I have this huge problem with my parents because I don't know if they gonna be allowing me or not since its too far from Manila and we really need a big budget for that. But I hope if all plans have been settled down, my parents will allow me to go.

Final Defense is fast approaching and I'm not yet ready to face our panelists. I'm so scared. But I know our group can do it. For now, we should focus on accomplishing Chapters 1 to 3. Wish us the best of luck. Our future lies here, promise.

Love Month will begin tomorrow...

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Train your mouth and heart until you can say the right thing at the right time and the right way for the right reasons.

Yesterday was really tiresome. As what we have planned, my thesismates and I went to the University of the Philippines to look for research materials that we will be using in our thesis. Our meeting place was at Monumento Station, 10am sharp. I woke up not so early because the meeting place is just near to ours. I took my breakfast and took a bath. Ian and Ryan were texting me and informing where they were. Sadly, Jeff was not replying to any of our messages for no reason at all. I was late, the only girl and the youngest in the group was late. I saw them waiting somewhere near the station. Then we started walking towards the loading area.

At first, we were quite unsure on what vehicle should we ride on. We stopped for a while until a bus stopped in front of us. We were all hesitant if we will be riding or not. Then Ryan asked the guy if it will pass by SM North and he said yes. We rode on that bus and went down at SM North. We waited for a jeep going to UP Campus. It was such a long ride going to the university.

After we reached the main library, we asked the guard and gave him the letter but he said that they don't allow undergraduates to research there. And we explained to him about our purpose and how our friends came there and researched. He understood it, finally and asked us to go to the Engineering Library. We walked for how many minutes because we were clueless about the said place. We asked a student there and good thing, we were heading to the right destination.

We reached the library but unfortunately, it was lunch break. What we did was we waited there for a little while since we can't walk again and find for some place to eat. We went back and started doing the thing. But we only find few information.

We went directly to Trinoma to eat. We strolled around. Ian and I toured Ryan because it was his first time there. You see, I'm the only girl. Wait, I enjoyed the day so much though I was with the boys. Well, they are so nice and gentlemen too. I have no problem with them.

Hopefully, we could accomplish the 2nd Chapter tomorrow because we are planning to pass it on Tuesday. And besides, we still need to do the Chapter 3.

Until now, I haven't decided about the Bataan Trip. I'm still confused. Hate this feeling.

Friday, January 25, 2008

There are battles you have to fight in silence because you know that speaking up, saying something or doing something will probably make you lose.

Right now, I'm so preoccupied with so many things in mind. I'm getting more and more confused. My thesis tops it all. Until now, we haven't completed the 2nd Chapter, to think that the submission for that would be on Monday. I'm expecting yesterday that we could finish the Foreign Studies and Literature today so that tomorrow, we will be looking for the Local Studies and Literature and yet until now, I haven't received their emails containing the things that they have researched for how many days now. I admit, I'm quite pissed because all the things that they're gonna be sending will be edited by me. So, it is really difficult on my part.

Another thing, we need to accomplish the 3rd Chapter before Friday comes and until now, our professor hasn't given the contents of that said chapter. We have to hurry up the first three chapters because on Friday, we will be presenting those chapters along with the questionnaires to one of the PLM staff. Never in my life, I have experienced this kind of thing that's why I'm really pressured. And the fact that nothing comes out from my mind makes me really frustrated. Plus grasping for the right words to be used in the thesis is not as easy as you may think. This thesis is really driving me insane.

My thesismates and I will be going to UP tomorrow to look for the things we need with regards to our thesis. My friends just visited the university this morning and they told me that they only find a little information and it makes me worry. And until now, my thesismates haven't texted me about the plan tomorrow. I don't know what's happening on them. Hopefully, they will text me about tomorrow's plan.

Aside from that, we were given tons of school works such as assignments, project and reporting. And I'm still worried about the result of my exams in IT Elect and NOS. You know, school is really pain in the ass but I can't find any reason why I am so in love with that place. Perhaps, because of the people I used to meet along the way and the friends whom I used to confide with.

And one more thing, my friends are planning, rather they are already decided of the Bataan Trip this Friday, I guess. I really want to come with them. The first time I heard about the plan, I really wanna go. I'm just kinda undecided because of some reasons. But yesterday, my mind started to get confused if I'll be joining them or now. The main reason is that he'll be coming also. It's not that I don't want to be with him, the truth is I love to because, maybe, we could talk and I could ask him the question "bakit hindi mo ko pinapansin?" but the fact that two of my girl friends (who apparently got a crush on him too, perhaps, like) will also be there and the fact that one of those girls(J) asked him to join the trip makes me think twice. Since the other girl(C) is just so aggressive, I'm afraid that they will become closer and I'm gonna witness all the things that they will do. I would be a hypocrite if I'm gonna say that I wouldn't be affected because until, I'm still affected with all the things he do. But I believe that if I'm going to face this kind of challenge and be able to survive it, it will be much easier for me to completely forget about him. What do you think? Join or not join?

I just hope everything will be okay.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

It's amazing how you continue to love someone you cannot have. Maybe because trying to stay away would hurt, so you might as well take the risk because either way you'd get hurt anyway. (so very true!)

So far, I have passed all of my midterm examinations and I'm so happy about it. I haven't failed any of them. Actually, I wasn't really confident with my answers during the exam because I really didn't study hard due to laziness. Plus, during the exam week, we were also busy for our thesis. I was not expecting for higher scores as long as I pass the exam, I'm very much contented about it.

Ever since the classes resume after the midterm exam, I have been very busy with regards to our thesis because PLM hasn't replied to us yet or rather say, we have been calling them yet no one was answering. We were quite annoyed and pissed because that thing is so important to us. Since Thursday last week, we were calling them and until yesterday, we still did but the phone just kept on ringing. So, we planned of going there this morning.

I was not able to come with them because I can't afford to absent myself to my M120 class because of the quiz. Ian, Ryan and Jeff went there this morning and fixed everything. Good thing, everything was so okay. They told me that the person they talked to looked for me because I was the only person who wasn't there that time. They just reasoned out. Now, we just have to concentrate on accomplishing the first three chapters and the questions that we will be asking because the person they were able to talk to told them that we need to pass those things on Feb. 1. For now, one down, more to go.

Aside from the thesis, our professors just started giving us school works. I'm just so confused right now on what and how to start because everything just keep on coming and we haven't done even a single thing. Hopefully, we could accomplish everything. By the way, this Saturday, my thesismates and I will be visiting UP to do some research works. Because the materials in Letran are not enough for our thesis.

Just this afternoon, we took our midterm exam in NOS and it was very difficult. I hate the fact that it wasn't either of the two professors who did the exam. The one who did was our former professor. Most of the questions were not yet discussed or not really a part of the subject that we are taking. I just wasted my time last night reviewing the Modules 1-5 of our MOC only to learn that the questions were not taken from the book. I'm just crossing my fingers about the result. I'm really not asking now for a high score, just a passing remark, it is very much okay with me.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

When someone really loves you, they will never hurt you and if they do, you will see that in their eyes, they are hurting too. ~Peter Parker

I woke up early and I really don't know why. As soon as my eyes opened after a deep sleep, I took my Windows Mobile right away and started texting my groupmates about the plan this afternoon. I also asked them to call PLM regarding the letter that we had submitted last Tuesday. But I didn't received any replies from them. Around 10am when they started replying. I was feeling it that the plan will not push through because Ian was in Rex's crib since yesterday and Ryan was also unsure. So, Ryan called and we found out that the offices are close during Saturdays. I have no choice but to cancel the plan and re-schedule it this week.

It was really boring in the house and I wanted to go out so badly. I planned of going to SM San Lazaro since it is just one ride away from our house. My mom agreed and she accompanied me there. I was also planning of buying new footwear eh. It was traffic going there and it was quite annoying. We reached SM and went directly to So! Fab. I love that store, promise. they've got lots of cute shoes, sandals, flats, slippers and the like plus the colors are so eye-catching. I found one but still undecided to buy. We strolled first and looked for something cuter but we found nothing. So, I settled down with the first one and bought it. Then, my mom and I strolled for a while then went home.

We just took a rest then we headed to Tondo Church to attend mass since tomorrow is Fiesta there. I saw lots of images of Sto. Niño and I find it cute. All of the images are dressed up in their own cute and stunning attires. After the mass, we went home.

Friday, January 18, 2008

It's really hard to freeze in sweetness when someone has already melted you into something bitter.

The oh-so deadly exams are now finally over, no, not all. I still have one exam left and there is still no definite date on when can we take the exams in NOS because the books are not yet distributed. Good thing, I was able to get my book on that subject before the Christmas break. And now, most of my batchmates haven't have their books and that is a major problem since our exam in that subject will be based on the book. So, probably, we still need to wait on when can the books be delivered to Letran from Singapore.

I went to school earlier because I taught my friends about Subnetting. Our first exam was Theology and I was expecting an easy exam but I was totally wrong. Since our professor in that subject was the one who did the exam and he was assuring us that the exam will be easy, I expected that. But I was really surprised because the exam was quite difficult. Yeah, I just used my stock knowledge and my common sense in answering the exam. Of course, I guessed. I'm looking forward for a passing remark.

After that, we stayed for quite a while at the Catwalk. I taught them again about Subnetting and I'm thankful because they got it easily. We were also throwing jokes with each other and laughing out loud. How I missed those times? We seldom have those kind of things because we are so busy now. And it was actually a good thing that we were able to revive it.

We took the second exam which was IT Elect. It was quite hard but kinda easy, as well. Well, our proctors for the exam were just so nice that's why we could ask each other about this and that. I find the exam okay. I'm hoping to pass that exam.

After taking the exam, we went to the stone bench and just chatted because while we were taking the exam, we were on different rooms because we belong to different sections. We talked, chatted, joked and laughed until we felt that we were starving. We went to 7/11 to have our merienda and continued our conversation there.

Then, we went back to pass our chapter 1 and Sir Armin told us that we should go back on Monday to get our 1st Chapter. We stayed for a little while at IIT and chatted with our professors until we decided to go home.

If the plan will push through, we will be going to PLM once again to check out the letter that we had forwarded to the president of the school and to know if our letter has been approved or not. Well, we badly need it because our defense is on the 1st week of March and we haven't finished the 2nd and 3rd Chapter. Hopefully, they will accept our proposal to lessen our thesis problem.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Forgetting the feelings you have for someone is one of the things that could never be easy. After a long time of loving, here you are now trying to forget but still loving in silence.

Instead of studying for our midterm exams, here I am now, typing a new entry for my blog. Well, talking about being lazy. But I finished reviewing Comp108 and Discrete Math last Saturday and so, I just read my notes this afternoon to see if I could still remember all the things that I have studied.

Yesterday, we had two sets of exams. I went to school early because Ian and I had to see Ms. Anna, our adviser, to check out our Chapter 1 plus I had to teach Niko about Linear Programming. But both of them were late. So, I stayed at the library for quite a while and had some chit-chatting with the couple, Eunice and JL. I was teasing JL about Eunice's former crushes and he was kinda pissed. haha ;P Well, I was just having my revenge.

After Ian arrived, we went directly to the IIT so we could talk to Ms. Anna and good thing, she was there. She asked us to go back after lunch because they were busy preparing the test papers. We went back to the library and waited for Niko. But, it was 12nn already yet he was nowhere in sight. We went down and stayed at the catwalk. He arrived around 12:30pm and I started teaching him the subject. He got it easily but hopefully, he could remember it once he takes the exam.

We first took Math120 and sad to say, it was difficult but not totally. But I'm still 50-50 about the result because I ain't sure if I'm going to pass it or not. But hopefully, I could pass. The next exam was Lit and I was surprised to know that our professor did the exam. It was not that difficult but you know, it wasn't that easy either. I just guessed and guessed because I was really clueless about the answers. I'm just crossing my finger about the results. I don't wanna fail.

Supposedly, I won't be going to school today because I don't have any exams scheduled for this day. But because our thesis is much more important than anything else, I went to school to meet up with my thesismates (Ian, Ryan and Jeff). I'm the rose among the thorns. Ian and Jeff went first to IIT to let our letter be signed by Ms. Anna. Then, they fetched me and Ryan at the library and off we went.

We went to PLM and asked the guard on to whom we should give our letter but our letter is addressed to the President but he wasn't around that time. So, he told us to go to the Student Affairs. Since, it is not our school, we are really clueless about the different buildings. Good thing, I met my cousin, Kuya Paulo, along the way. He walked us to the office and left us because he still needs to review for his exams. We talked to the guy but after how many minutes, he told us to go to the College of Engineering. Kuya Paulo walked us once again and we were able to talk to Mr. Flores because the Dean took a lunch break. He then again referred us to the chairperson of Computer Science but he wasn't there in his office. And since we can't go back after lunch, the guard decided to forward our letter to the president and we just need to call them tomorrow.

We were really tired because we walked from one building to another to think that the buildings are not close to each other. We were exhausted because the persons that we were able to talk to just referred us to another person and then referred us again to another one, it was like a cycle. Thanks for the guard because he was really nice to us. And Kuya Pau for walking us to our destinations.

I went home after that because I still need to review for my exams tomorrow. I took a rest first then, I studied. I have two sets of exams tomorrow and I want to pass those exams so badly.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Don't hold too long to what's never meant, sometimes, we need to set things free before it hurts us badly.

I just came from a sickness. I have been suffering severe cough and cold for four days now and I even got a fever. It was really hard to concentrate on things because I wasn't really feeling well. You know how uncomfortable it was. Good thing, yesterday was a no class day and I was able to have a rest.

Nothing much happened last Monday. We just sat down and listened to whatever my professors were telling us. And it was actually about our upcoming Midterm Examinations. They gave us the things that we need to review and the schedule, as well. I had some moments with my friends though I admit, I didn't enjoy that day much because I wasn't feeling well. But I'm really glad to see them all again.

I got fever on Tuesday and I was planning not to go to school but I was thinking about our thesis. So, I went to school but to my dismay, my professor in Research Methods was absent. Instead of going home, I attended my next classes though I wasn't feeling good.

Yesterday was a no class day because it was the Feast of the Black Nazarene. I took a rest the entire day. And finally, I felt a lot better. I didn't stay online for a long time so my eyes could rest, as well.

And now, I'm okay already though I still have cough and cold. For the last minute, they still discussed some lessons. Good thing, the topics are very much interesting. I just hate Flash because my professor is not really good. I'm really trying my best to understand and explore Macromedia Flash all by myself. And now, she gave us an activity to be submitted next week and I haven't learned anything, only a little.

Our thesis is driving me crazy now. We need to pass the edited Chapter 1 on Wednesday and yet, we haven't visited the school where we will be conducting our study. Tss. Our professor is really confusing eh. I really can't understand her. Plus the second chapter is due next next week. The mock defense will be on February and the final defense will be on the first week of March. My schedule is so hectic now.

Midterm exams will start on Monday and I still haven't studied my lessons. I'll start reviewing tomorrow after I attend my make-up class on NOS. I have lot of things to do and I don't know what to start first.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

The minute you think of giving up, think of the reason why you held on for so long?

Starting tomorrow, I will be back in my job and that is being a student. After a two-week Christmas break, here we are now, facing again our professors and doing their never-ending school works. I am not yet ready, as in. I just can't get enough of vacation. If only I could extend it, I will but I know I can't.

Once I go back to school tomorrow, I'm expecting a lot of school works to accomplish and maybe, surprise quizzes. Of course, they will again discuss their over boring lessons and give us their oh so difficult and long assignments. Argh.

Oh by the way, just today, my classmate informed me about this assignment in one of our major subjects and to make it worst, that assignment will be passed tomorrow. What the heck?! I really can't understand my professor in NOS. We had a two-week vacation yet he just gave the assignment just now, to think that it will be handwritten and due tomorrow. I checked the Yahoo Groups and he gave 9 questions. The answers can be found in the book but the problem is that the answers are really long. He is so annoying, as always. He is just so unpredictable. Aside from that, he gave our assignment for Wednesday and he scheduled a make-up class on Friday. Talking about being busy. We haven't been stepping our royal feet in the campus yet we are already given lots of things to do.

I have been thinking a lot about our thesis because ever since the Colegio Week started, my thesismates and I haven't talked about it because we became so busy with the event. We haven't updated each other on what we should do next. I'm afraid that we might not accomplish it on time. But hopefully, as soon as the classes resume, we could talk about it already. Well, I'm feeling it, the defense would probably be a month away and I'm so scared about it. haha :P I know, there is nothing to be scared of but I can't stop myself from feeling it.

Also, our midterm examinations will be on next week and I haven't been learning a lot from the day that the second semester has started. I might study well this week because I have this fear of failing. I have to give my best on the exams because I'm not really satisfied with my performance for the past two months.

On the contrary, I feel so glad because I will be seeing my friends once again. I just missed them so much and I can't wait to see them all again. After all, we haven't talked that much during the past weeks and I haven't texted them, as well. For sure, we have lots of stories to share tomorrow. I just missed our tawanan, kulitan and kalokohan.

By the way, I am so happy that Ruben Gonzaga emerged as the Big Winner of PBBCE2 ousting his co-housemates, Riza, Gaby and Will. Ever since the season started, I was really rooting for him because I do believe that he is the most deserving amongst the other. Financially, we all know how much he needs money. His family are not as wealthy as the other housemates and his family badly needs it. In terms of attitude and character, he proved that he is something that he isn't just any ordinary person. He showed what he is really made of and he never let himself be left out by other housemates. For me, he really deserves the title.

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Avoiding someone has only two reasons: either you hate that person or you're in love with that person.

And because it's new year, I have a new layout. I decided to change the layout of my blog because I have been using the former layout for how many months now. The theme of the layout has nothing to do with me, okay? haha :P Maybe, a little but not really because I am not totally broken.

Most of us, I guess, create their own lists of resolutions that they should fulfill within the year. But in my case, I don't really make a list because I'm afraid that I might not fulfill or achieve it. What I usually do is to just go with the flow. I just do the things that I think are right and as much as possible, try to avoid doing bad acts. But you know, we can't stop ourselves from doing bad especially when it is needed to.

Life is just too short. We should do the things that will make us happy and that will satisfy us but of course, with certain limitations. We should not always follow the rules because where's the fun if you always do the right things? Well, in my case, I admit that I usually do what is right and always follow the rules but if you really know me well, you will discover the naughty side of me. I also break the rules and do bad things but not as worst as you could imagine. I am nice but I can be naughty.

Four days from now, the classes in Letran will resume and I am not yet ready. Our Christmas break should be extended. haha :D Well, I'm not ready to face my oh so diligent professors and do their never ending school works. But I guess, I have to motivate myself already. I have a lot of pending school stuffs eh.

Moreover, our midterm exams will start on the 14th and I haven't learned a lot since the second semester started. But I promise myself that I will study really hard starting next week. I have to ready myself with the major exams because I am not convinced with my performances during the past two months. I should, at least, get high scores in my midterm exams so that I can get high grades. I'm getting nervous already.

Anyway, within this day, I just did nothing but to create layout and the new layout here in my blog is the result of my hardwork. haha :D Last month, I have made one already but I am not satisfied with what I have done that's why I decided to create a new one. I find it cute but how about you? Care to comment? Thanks!

3 - Happy Birthday Jude!

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

The hardest part in being loved by someone is the uncertainty that it may stop anytime.

Welcome year 2008!!! Happy New Year everyone! Another fruitful year has ended and another year has just begun. A lot has happened on me during the past year and I can barely recall everything. From the good things up to the bad ones, I can still recall all of them. Well, for me, it was really a great year.

Let's have a recap.

I had tons of school works. I can still remember that I was really cramming that time because school stuff were all piled up.

Our section in PE competed in the inter-section cheering competition. We didn't win yet we were the 1st runner up.
Our SAD thesis defense was cancelled and we were celebrating.

We were still busy accomplishing lots of school works and preparing for the final exams.
There was no thesis defense in VB (machine problem).
The first ever outing of my blockmates. Chillax Crew was born.

I have received my Windows Mobile from my dad.
I got hooked with Princess Hours. haha :D
My debut celebration was confirmed because we already paid for the downpayment.

Nationwide Election
I became the Reyna Elena for Sto. Niño's 24th year.
Ate Pheejay and Kuya Marc got married.

The start of my junior life in college.
I have experienced the bloody adjustment of schedules.
Season 83 of the NCAA had started.
I've got to see for the first time Dex Quindoza in person.

Thine Iced celebrated our 2nd year of friendship.
The Letran Knights beat the San Beda Red Lions for the first time since season 82.

I have been very busy not just with school, but also, with the preparations for my debut party.
Something happened that tested the friendship of the Chillax Crew.
I realized that I'm already falling for him.
My dad came from Saudi for a vacation and for my debut party.

A two-day recollection at Antipolo.
My much awaited moment has finally come.
Bonding moments with dad.
I decided to give up on him but I was not able to fulfill it.
Dyei's debut

DLSU Green Archers had their sweetest comeback as they grabbed the championship crown on this season of UAAP.
Daddy Carlo ran for Kagawad in our barangay and he won.
We had our review for the MCP Examinations.
I realized how he hurt me and decided to give up on whatever feelings I have for him.
I failed my first take of the MCP Exams.

Kuya Karl had a two-week vacation here in the Philippines.
I became a certified professional as I passed the second shot of the MCP Exams.
I have given up on him already yet the feelings was still there.

My first time to stroll around Trinoma.
Lots and lots of school stuff to accomplish.
I almost cried because of him.
I have accepted the fact that I'm still into him and that I haven't forgotten everything about him.
Partying, dancing and drinking during the IT Knights Out.
Rocking the Letran campus during the Arriba Fest.

All in all, I really had a very wonderful year though at some point in time, I felt bad and sad. Year 2007 was one of the best years in my life. I was able to do things that I haven't been doing yet in my 18 years of existence into this world. It was indeed a superb year for me.

I want to thank God for another year in my life, for letting me experience things that I haven't experienced in the past years and for the great people I have met along the way. I want to thank my family for their unfailing love and care. I want to thank my friends for sharing year 2007 with me and for the happy memories that we have all shared.

With that, I'm looking forward to a very delightful year ahead. Well, may this year bring a lot of fun memories and tons of happiness. May God still shower me and the great people around me a lot of blessings and still guide us all throughout. May year 2008 be another memorable year in our lives.