Knowing that you've been loved by someone makes every morning worth getting up for.

I'm so fed up with doing the same routine everyday but I don't have the right to change it or what. Why? You wanna know why? Well, I'm still a bum up to this very moment. And now, I am a professional bum.

Its been two months (almost, actually) since my graduation day and up to now, I haven't found a job. No, it's not about being lazy but it is just really difficult to find a job nowadays due to the financial meltdown and most IT companies require a minimum of one year experience.

I don't want to enter the field of call center. I'm neither against the type of business nor the agents but it's not the job I want. Receiving calls from clients is not the type of job suited for me. And besides, I don't wanna risk my health for the sake of money or work. Plus, I know I can't work on a graveyard shift.

But I badly want a job now. I have been applying online since April and only got a few calls. I have attended exams and interviews and yet, I haven't received any calls coming from them regarding my application. Many have told me to wait because it is still too early. That is what I am doing now - waiting for nothing. But then, I'm still applying. It's kinda frustrating because some of my friends and batchmates have their respective jobs already and working on some reputable companies while me, still unemployed.

I have applied on one of the best companies here. I passed the phone interview and took the exam but until now I haven't received any calls coming from them. Know what, that company is my dream workplace. When I first stepped into their office, the feeling was really different - a feeling that I haven't felt on other companies I went to. And I said to myself, "I really wanna work here."

I keep on praying that God would allow me to work there. It is the company I would love to work with. I hope God would answer my prayers. It will really mean a lot to me. And guys, please do pray that the company I am talking about will hire me real soon. It's my dream company, swear. Thanks!

Anyway, I am quite pissed for the defeat of the Denver Nuggets just this morning. They were defeated by the Los Angeles Lakers with a 4-2 playoffs record. I'm friggin' sad because I am an anti-Kobe ever since. :) But then, I still have Orlando Magic on the other side, still fighting to win the Eastern Conference Finals over the Cleveland Cavaliers.

Credit

I am not a Magic fan ever since not until I watched how great Hedo Turkoglu in shooting. I am always attracted to guys who play Basketball well, most especially, shooters, point and shooting guards. And Dwight Howard is cool, as well. Orlando Magic, I think, is the coolest team in the NBA. I hope they will be this year's champ 'cause I know how hungry and thirsty they are for the crown.

By the way, I have read this news in Yahoo!:

Credit

"Eminem, who was born 2-1/2 years after the Beatles broke up, is the only artist who has sold more albums in this decade than the fabled foursome. Eminem's new album Relapse sold 608,000 copies this week, lengthening his lead as the artist who has sold the most albums in the 2000s. The rap superstar has sold 31,127,000 albums since the first week of January 2000. In second place: The Beatles, who have sold 27,591,000 albums in the same period. (That's not bad for a group that broke up in 1970.) The Beatles have done better in this decade relative to the competition than they did in the ‘90s, when they were the #5 album-selling act.

Eminem, 31,127,000. First charted: 1999. Eminem, 36, is the top male artist and the top rap artist so far in this decade. His 2000 album The Marshall Mathers LP is his best-seller. It has sold 10,178,000 copies."

To let you know, I am a big fan of the White Rapper, Eminem. :)

I'm not saying that I'm in love, I'm just saying that lately, he's all I think about.

Since I am too lazy to create an entry, I will just share some pictures of me, being part of a Santacruzan. It was also a celebration of the Anniversary of Sto. Niño and birthday of my cousin, Kuya Roy. I'll do a post next time. Now, pictures galore muna. :)

Reina, Celine, Cez and Camille

Camille, Cez, Celine, Reina, Zachee and Erika

Cez and Kuya Roy

Multiply Updates:
One, Two and Three
By the way, pictures are for contacts only.

There are a lot of people who call you by your name. But there is only one person who can make it sounds so special.

Yes, indeed. I was able to watch the much awaited concert of the year - Davids Live in Manila. It was really the concert that I have been waiting for a long time. I really can't afford to miss the opportunity of seeing David Cook in person and hear him sing live. I have been wanting for this event to come and yeah, it did happen.

I really have no plans of buying any ticket at all because I know Kuya Ome, my cousin, would be there as part of the security. Just so you know, he is also part of the security of some famous bars in the country namely Embassy, Prince of Jaipur, Ascend, Temple Bar and such. When I first heard of the concert, I immediately asked my mom to text Kuya Ome regarding the concert 'cause I really know he will be there and I'm so right.

I have been a David Cook fan since day one of American Idol and I am really impressed about his performances every week until he was named as the American Idol. I have downloaded all the songs included in his first and second-slash-major album. Aside from having that beautiful face, I also love his cool smile which mesmerizes me everytime I look at him on TV or Internet. His smile is really captivating.

If only I knew he had a mall tour in SM North Edsa, I might have a picture of him with me. Kuya Ome told me that some of his bouncer friends were there as part of the security and he could let me have a picture of DC. Oh! I just missed a great opportunity.

Yesterday morning, I was like undecided if I'll be going to Mall of Asia to watch or not. The reason was because Kuya Ome still didn't know by that time if he could let us in. I've been reflecting and thinking that if I will go there and he couldn't let us in, it will be a big disappointment for me but if I will not go and yet there will be sure spots for us, I will surely miss a lot. My mom called my cousin telling him that I will not come anymore but he said that we should because he will do his best for us to be able to watch the concert. Yeah, we went there and I was truly excited.

I went there with Ej and Jasper. We arrived at around 6:30 and we went directly to the backstage as instructed by my cousin. We, three, were super excited to see the two Davids perform on the stage. We may haven't had the seats but standing there for quite a long time was indeed worth it. We watched first the fireworks display. Ate Meryll arrived followed by his brother.

At around 8:30 when the concert started. David Archuleta performed first and everyone was screaming at the top of their lungs. He was cool. He did great. I never thought that he performs better during live than on TV. He was smiling all the time. He sang songs from his album.

After DA, we waited for a couple of minutes because they were fixing the stage for DC. We watched first a 15-minute fireworks display as part of the event. And then, the next part started. The intro of The World I Know was played with David Cook rising up from below. I hope you can picture out what I am talking about. Anyway, he nailed the first song so as to the rest of the songs he sang. He greeted everyone "Magandang Gabi!"

David Cook was really amazing, great, superb, terrific, one of a kind, unbelievable, excellent, outstanding, marvelous, tremendous, exceptional and in fact, words are not enough to describe how great he was that night. He showed that he is indeed the American Idol. I just can't help but smile to the fact that David Cook was really in front of me, singing and performing. It was really incredible. He rocked it. Everyone was hyper and screaming out loud.

Some of the Filipino words he said aside from Magandang Gabi were Mabuhay and Salamat Po. And it was funny because he also said "Salamat Po so much."

After the concert, we felt how tiresome it was. Our knees, legs and thighs were aching. I really can't believe that I watched their concert. I had an amazing night, as in. I hope David Cook will come back here and perform again. And if that day happens, I will surely buy the most expensive ticket just to watch him again perform live.

Pictures and videos will be uploaded in my Multiply. Just check it out.

You must feel sorry for those who broke your heart because one day they will just wake up and realize they had the world but they let it go.

For the past few weeks, rather months, I have been dealing with the certain gap or conflict that our crew has encountering. This is not the first time that our friendship has been tested but I know, for sure, that this is the worst.

During the early years of our college life, we were really inseparable. We wanted to do things together, hang out together and they even persuaded the other members of the crew, including me, to join them on every activity that they planned to do. That was the peak of the beautiful friendship we built since first year.

It was really overwhelming that even though some of the crew chose a different specialization and that we haven't gotten the chance to see each other more often, still the friendship is there, alive and kicking. Text messages were the only bridges for us to communicate especially during semestral and summer vacations. We maintained it and despite the distance, we were able to nurture our friendship.

When we reached our junior year, we became closer than ever. It was actually the most enjoying year of the Chillax Crew, I must say. We shared a lot. We used to do things together. We hanged out often. We bonded like hell even after dismissal. We stayed late and went to different places just to be with each other and enjoyed every minute together. It was fun. We were all happy. I've gotten the chance to become close to everybody and the feeling was really different. I've come to know the real them and I am so glad with it. They taught me a lot of things that I could never forget.

I thought our friendship is long lasting. I thought it will stand the test of time and that it will continue to grow despite the fact that we will barely see each other. But I guess, I was wrong. Totally wrong.

The start of our Senior year was also the beginning of the conflict, of the problem, of the worst scenarios ever. I must admit, the year started out very good until something happened. It brought a lot of problems. And I felt that it was the time that our friendship was starting to fall apart. You know it was hard because I've become really close to every one of them and I just can't choose on who I want to be with.

But then not all things are meant to last forever. There are things that you have to let go even though you want to hold on until you can. You just can't force them to do something that they don't want to do. That's a desperate move. Though we tried to fix every single problem, every single conflict, still, nothing changed. We tried really hard. But it was too tough. We have never been completed since then. In short, laging may kulang.

I thought that everything will be back to normal after Retreat but it didn't. Still, they've made it worst. I don't know, maybe, they are all fed up seeing the same faces everyday. Our friendship is tearing apart. It's all broken and damaged.

On every text message that we sent, no one wanted to reply. On every invitation that we gave, no one is interested to come. I guess, this is the end. Or maybe, a beginning of a beautiful friendship with my F4. I have never been one of the boys not until they catch me when the rest of the world left me. It was unbelievable. I never expected that we will be this close and that I will be able to share to them everything including my problems.

I know that I have been really nice to everybody. If only I could give them everything I have, I will. I let them see the generous part of me. I may not be a perfect friend, but still, I tried to be. Perhaps, I talked behind their backs but eventually, I realized my mistake. I've never bullshitted them. I've never traded them unlike what they are doing now. I've never searched for their replacement. I even tried to make this friendship work even though it is impossible. I tried my best, I really tried but they never appreciated it. They have never seen my worth.

What now? Am I a suspect? Am I the one to blame? Do they hate me? Or are they just jealous for the all out attention given by my F4 to me? Oh well, I don't want to think that they are jealous or insecure but I can't help. After all, they are letting me see their true colors, their real persona. So what if they don't talk to me, if they talk behind me, if they hate me? I have real friends beside me who chose to stay with me than to bullshit me.

But then, I don't hate them for that. They have become my close friends. I have wonderful memories with them that will be cherished no matter what. Hating them is the least thing that I can do and I won't do it just because they are treating me like this. No, it's not me. I still love them despite the attitude that they are showing.

And now, I can finally say, Chillax Crew is gone. It fell apart. It was ruined and will never be whole again. Some of the parts are missing. It's too impossible to bring it back again. Forgetting is somehow a solution for them, avoiding us is what they do but I don't think I could forget them. After all, they have been nice to me before. That was before. No more Chillax Crew. No more.

People come and go so choose those who are willing to stay. How I wish my F4 (Ian, Niko, Rex and Marco), Dyei and Eunice are more than willing to.